Word of my nuisance is clearly spreading. This LiveHelp staff member quickly realized I was just wasting time, and passed me to Jose, another supervisor. This is still Day 186 BTW.

1:53:25 PMSystemInitial Question/Comment: Other
1:53:30 PMSystemThank you for contacting eBay Live Help!
1:53:30 PMSystemJesse G. has joined this session!
1:53:30 PMSystemConnected with Jesse G.
1:53:30 PMJesse G.Hello, thank you for waiting and welcome to eBay Live Chat! My name is Jesse. If you're a registered member, may I please start by having you confirm your User ID and first name?
1:53:42 PM[eBaiting]Hey, Jesse G, I remember you
1:53:49 PM[eBaiting]You transferred me to Meridyth earlier this morning
1:54:05 PMJesse G.Yes, I can remember you too. How may I help you?
1:54:13 PM[eBaiting]Hehehehehehe, everybody remembers me!
1:54:21 PM[eBaiting]I'm so memorable
1:54:42 PM[eBaiting]Well, just thought I'd ask once again if there is any way to speed up the closure of my account.
1:54:49 PM[eBaiting]The email I got says I need to wait 2 weeks
1:54:55 PM[eBaiting]IF I have buying or selling activity
1:54:57 PM[eBaiting]But I don't
1:55:09 PM[eBaiting]So can Trust & Safety just close it now?
1:55:50 PMJesse G.I'd like to inform you that Trust and Safety has their own process to follow.
1:56:09 PM[eBaiting]Yeah but they don't follow it
1:56:35 PMJesse G.I'm sorry to hear that.
1:57:10 PMJesse G.But that's the process of Trust and Safety, so it would be best if you will wait for it to be closed.
1:57:14 PMJesse G.Is there anything else I can help you with?
1:57:23 PM[eBaiting]Why can't I contact Trust and Safety directly?
1:57:27 PM[eBaiting]Do they not Trust me?
1:57:31 PM[eBaiting]Or do they fear for their Safety?
1:57:44 PM[eBaiting]EHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHE that was so goshdarn clever
1:58:25 PMJesse G.No, they can only be reached through email.
1:58:41 PM[eBaiting]How do they get their paychecks to them?
1:58:45 PMJesse G.Since they handle concerns that needs further investigation or process.
1:59:10 PMJesse G.For security reasons, we wouldn't be able to disclose that information.
1:59:21 PM[eBaiting]What if they order a pizza? How do they get it?
1:59:55 PMJesse G.I'd be glad to answer if you have further eBay related questions.
2:00:19 PM[eBaiting]Want to see a picture of my kitty?
2:00:23 PM[eBaiting]http://[Linky to a picture of my kitty]
2:00:50 PMJesse G.Do you have any eBay related questions?
2:00:57 PM[eBaiting]Yes
2:01:06 PM[eBaiting]Would someone at eBay like to see a picture of my kitty
2:01:55 PMJesse G.AS I mentioned earlier, we wouldn't be able to answer personal or non-eBay related questions.
2:02:12 PM[eBaiting]Is eBay PayPal?
2:02:50 PMJesse G.No, they are different company that work together.
2:02:56 PM[eBaiting]Is eBay Half.com?
2:04:00 PMJesse G.It's the same with PayPal, they work together.
2:04:56 PM[eBaiting]Is eBay friends with PayPal?
2:04:56 PMJesse G.Is there anything else I can help you with?
2:05:15 PMJesse G.Yes.
2:05:25 PM[eBaiting]Does eBay like PayPal better than Half.com?
2:08:25 PM[eBaiting]I love my pet kitty
2:08:35 PM[eBaiting]She is soft and snuggable
2:10:00 PMSystemJose F. has joined this session!
2:10:06 PMJose F.Thank you for waiting! My name is Jose and I'm Jesse's manager. Kindly give me moment while I check on your conversation ok?
2:10:08 PM[eBaiting]Hi Jose F
2:10:10 PM[eBaiting]Ok
2:10:25 PMJose F.Hi! How's your day?
2:10:46 PM[eBaiting]It is okay
2:10:50 PM[eBaiting]Except my account is still open
2:12:00 PMJose F.May I please ask why your closing your account?
2:12:12 PMSystemJesse G. has left this session!
2:12:17 PM[eBaiting]It is a L-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-N-G story, are you sure you want to hear it?
2:12:50 PMJose F.Sure! I have the time to listen.
2:12:55 PM[eBaiting]If I tell it, are you going to actually do something to close my account?
2:12:59 PM[eBaiting]Or are you just going to tell me to wait like everybody else does?
2:13:30 PMJose F.I have my time to lsiten to your concern today, your lucky I'm not that busy!
2:13:39 PM[eBaiting]Sure why not
2:13:42 PM[eBaiting]I am bored
2:13:57 PM[eBaiting]Back in October last year, my account was hijacked.
2:14:10 PM[eBaiting]I do not know how, I never give out my password and am always careful about phishing.
2:14:28 PM[eBaiting]Someone used my account to list some bootleg DVD box sets.
2:14:41 PM[eBaiting]My account was locked but not suspended
2:14:51 PM[eBaiting]I called eBay and they unlocked it again
2:14:53 PM[eBaiting]So far so good
2:15:02 PM[eBaiting]The next day, my account WAS suspended
2:15:09 PM[eBaiting]All of my valid listings were ended
2:15:24 PM[eBaiting]The reason for that was
2:15:44 PM[eBaiting]The people who unlocked my account after the bogus DVD listings
2:15:51 PM[eBaiting]Did NOT report this to the VeRO people
2:16:04 PM[eBaiting]So the VeRO people thought I had deliberately listed infringing items
2:16:06 PM[eBaiting]And suspended me.
2:16:18 PM[eBaiting]I have other issues with eBay as well

Here we go. I lay it ALLLLL out for him, and just at that exact moment...

2:16:47 PM[eBaiting]I hate the fact that people can sell an item for 1 cent and charge $49.99 for shipping to dodge fees
2:17:07 PM[eBaiting]I hate the fact that people can email sellers during an auction and convince them to end the auction early and sell the item privately
2:17:32 PM[eBaiting]I hate the fact that Power Sellers and huge corporations can get away with rule violations that small sellers get their auctions pulled for.
2:17:51 PM[eBaiting]I hate the fact that eBay never enforces its own rules and lets scammers run rampant
2:18:13 PM[eBaiting]I hate the fact that it takes 5 pages of junk to slog through before you can list a single item
2:18:24 PM[eBaiting]I hate the fact that eBay never does anything about deadbeat bidders
2:18:55 PM[eBaiting]I hate the fact that when I have a problem with eBay, I have to talk to a different person every single time I call, and repeat my entire story every time.
2:19:08 PMSystemJose F. has left this session!
2:19:08 PMSystemThank you for contacting eBay Live Help!
2:19:15 PMSystemYou are successfully connected to eBay Live Help. Please hold for the next available Live Help Agent.
2:20:10 PMSystemWe appreciate your patience. You will be able to type in your question as soon as you are connected with a Live Help Agent. Please continue to hold for the next available representative.
2:20:10 PMSystemChyna M. has joined this session!
2:20:10 PMSystemConnected with Chyna M.
2:20:15 PMChyna M.Hello, thank you for waiting and welcome to eBay Live Chat! My name is Chyna. If you're a registered member, may please I start by having you confirm your User ID and first name?
2:20:24 PM[eBaiting]Oh that's REAL nice Jose.
2:20:28 PM[eBaiting]Didn't like what I was saying, huh?
2:20:35 PM[eBaiting]So you dump me back to the regular CS reps.
2:20:40 PM[eBaiting]Very professional.
2:21:05 PMChyna M.No, you were just disconnected.
2:21:16 PM[eBaiting]That must be a supervisor problem.
2:21:20 PMChyna M.I can get you connected to him again.
2:21:24 PM[eBaiting]I had the same thing happen 3 times with Meridyth this morning.
2:21:32 PMChyna M.Would you like me to transfer you to him now?
2:21:33 PM[eBaiting]Somebody should upgrade the supers' computers
2:21:38 PM[eBaiting]to SUPERcomputers!
2:21:44 PM[eBaiting]Sure why not
2:21:55 PMChyna M.Thanks! Please hang on.
2:22:08 PMSystemChyna M. has left this session!
2:22:10 PMSystemJose F. has joined this session!
2:22:10 PMSystemConnected with Jose F.
2:22:19 PM[eBaiting]This chat is SO going up on my webpage along with all the others
2:22:35 PMJose F.Sorry we got disconnected.
2:22:49 PM[eBaiting]Yeah just when I was criticizing eBay
2:22:53 PM[eBaiting]What a curious coincidence
2:24:25 PMJose F.I was about to place a reply on your chat when I got disconnected with you.
2:24:48 PM[eBaiting]Well? I'm waiting
2:25:12 PM[eBaiting]Just so you know you are not making me mad, if that is what you are trying to do.
2:25:19 PM[eBaiting]I am through being upset with this putrid company
2:25:28 PM[eBaiting]Instead I find it alternately hilarious and sad.
2:26:35 PMJose F.I'm not doing this to make you mad. There are just some instances that chats get disconnected. If I have that intention then I should have not taken this chat again right?
2:26:55 PM[eBaiting]It seems to happen mostly with supervisors.
2:27:06 PM[eBaiting]I got "accidentally disconnected" from Meridyth 3 times this morning
2:27:28 PM[eBaiting]The further up I climb, the harder it is to communicate.
2:29:16 PMJose F.It's not going to be like that.
2:29:27 PM[eBaiting]If you say so
2:30:50 PMJose F.I just saw your last conversation with Merydith and it took more than 2 hours.
2:31:15 PMJose F.If she even had the intention to disconnect you then she should have done that earlier right?
2:31:38 PM[eBaiting]A lot of that time was empty space
2:31:42 PM[eBaiting]She was probably answering other chats
2:31:47 PM[eBaiting]That's how it works, right?
2:32:35 PMJose F.She's probably handling other member's as well that's making her reply to you a little delayed.
2:33:54 PM[eBaiting]Imagine how much faster everything would go if they would just close my account
2:35:57 PM[eBaiting]Can you keep this session open for a bit? I need to go do something
2:35:59 PM[eBaiting]You said you had time
2:36:08 PM[eBaiting]I guess I shall see if it is really so
2:36:26 PMJose F.I already saw the email being routed and it's about your account being stucked on termination pending.
2:36:51 PMJose F.I was just checking the mail you sent that's why I was quite for some time.
2:38:39 PM[eBaiting]Yeah they fixed that this morning
2:39:16 PMJose F.And we just have to wait for this to be fixed ok?
2:40:17 PM[eBaiting]No
2:40:23 PM[eBaiting]It is fixed
2:40:41 PM[eBaiting]And the closure should only take 2 weeks if I have bidding/selling activity
2:40:43 PM[eBaiting]Which I don't
2:40:46 PM[eBaiting]That is what the email said
2:41:36 PMJose F.Yes. But if it's not done after that time then we usually ask members to make a follow-up.
2:44:00 PM[eBaiting]Which is what I have done
2:44:07 PM[eBaiting]Every every day
2:46:26 PMJose F.I know that there might be some delay regarding this but much as I would to answer you regarding that only the trust and safety team can properly answer that for you.
2:46:59 PM[eBaiting]Yes but they never do
2:48:11 PMJose F.We just have to wait for them to reply to you. They might have escalated this to the retention team that's why the closure is taking time considering the amount of transactions you had with eBay.
2:49:16 PM[eBaiting]Unfortunately I hope you understand I will continue to do this until it does get resolved.
2:50:06 PMJose F.I understand. You can always send a follow-up to them until you get to have your concerns resolved.
2:50:13 PM[eBaiting]And LiveHelp
2:51:51 PMJose F.I hope you'll understand as well that even if you get connected with Live Help we will not be able to close your account for you. Live Chat is mainly for general questions of how to use the site, and while we want to help all of our members immediately, Live Chat may not be equipped with the information for very specific site questions, nor the tools or ability to address particular concerns, like account statuses. When this happens, we refer the member to the team that can address those questions or concerns directly, and are better enabled to help that member out with their question or concern. Also, for instances where a member might have to write in to a specific department, this allows us to keep a track of the e-mail correspondence, as well as gives the member an opportunity to save all the e-mail responses to keep for future reference as well.
2:52:03 PM[eBaiting]Ooh, nice copy n paste Jose
2:53:06 PMJose F.It's actually the complete information that Live Help can do for members.

And this, this right here, is the biggest problem I have with eBay. You can't talk to the people who can help you. The people you CAN talk to can't talk to the people who can help you. And eBay honestly believes this system works.

[Total chat time: 1 hour, almost exactly.]

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